


Bonds

by silkencrow



Series: One Step at a Time [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Dean Winchester is Protective of Castiel, Emotionally Hurt Castiel (Supernatural), Idiots in Love, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Pre-Relationship, Protective Dean Winchester, really short so sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:40:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28293969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silkencrow/pseuds/silkencrow
Summary: Castiel is making progress in his training - more so with blades than with guns. But his trials with sleep and dreams remain an obstacle for him to overcome. Luckily, Dean is more than willing to help.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: One Step at a Time [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1931116
Kudos: 36





	Bonds

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and welcome back! This is super short, I know, but I wanted to post something since it's been a while. Either way, I hope you enjoy! Allons-y!

“Again!”

The knife flew from the tips of Castiel’s fingers with deadly precision, striking the target dead center. Dean was smiling, obviously satisfied, in Castiel’s periphery. He felt warmth permeate his chest at being the one to make Dean proud. After weeks of training with firearms, of which he was  _ not  _ as proficient, it felt nice to be good at something again.

Blades and knives and steel - Castiel knew those things intimately. He’d been a soldier once, after all. A warrior of Heaven.

This he could do without needing to have his hand held.

“Badass, man!” Dean exclaims, clapping Castiel heartily on the shoulder. “I’d say you’re better than Sammy and I with blades. I think that’s probably enough for today.”

Castiel hesitates to follow Dean as the other man walks out of their designated training area. Dean has been harsh in his teachings, but Castiel is more thankful for that than Dean would ever know. It’s been hard getting accommodated with the aches and pains that accompany training. Castiel has been told that Jimmy was probably in his late thirties, and apparently that is the time when a human body starts to hurt. Constantly.

Castiel never truly understood the hardships inherent to human existence. He knows now, though. 

The aches and pains. The  _ sleeping _ . It has been months since he became human, and still the sleeping refused to feel natural. For Dean’s sake, he has stopped waiting until exhaustion causes him to pass out to fall asleep. They’d argued about it, actually. Dean ended up threatening to never take him on hunts if he didn’t start sleeping at least a little every night. 

Castiel heard Sam berating Dean for being too harsh later that night, and Dean’s words still reverberated in Castiel’s head like the tolling of a bell.

_ “I don’t care if Cas ends up hating me, as long as I can keep him alive. That’s what matters, Sammy. That he’s  _ safe  _ and  _ alive _.”  _

Castiel could never hate Dean. With absolute certainty, he knew this to be true. Castiel wished Dean knew this, but there was a good chance that even if Castiel told him he wouldn’t believe it.

Dean has a horrible tendency to think the worst of himself. Castiel couldn’t change that as an angel - how could he possibly change it as a human? That didn't stop him from wanting to try though. Castiel couldn't really explain it, but he felt it was important Dean knew his value. Had always felt that - even in the beginning when they were still practically strangers. 

“Cas? You comin?” Dean stopped at the door and had been watching Castiel stare down at the throwing knife still held loosely in his grip. His eyes shone with thinly veiled concern, intelligent gaze tagging the conflictions strung all throughout Castiel’s body language. “Everything alright?”

“Yes, of course,” Castiel replies automatically. Dean narrows his eyes and Castiel feels his stomach muscles tighten. “I was thinking about our argument about sleep," he blurts out. Dean looks taken aback for half a moment, then a scowl quickly takes over his features. 

“I told you, you have to sleep, Cas.” Dean stalks back over to him and his stomach tightens oddly once again. Distantly, he remembers that these are called “butterflies” but that information is very far removed from the forefront at the moment. 

“I know it’s weird for you still, but seriously man, humans can die from not getting enough sleep for a number of reasons.” Dean seems to hesitate. “Is it...because of nightmares? Or is it still the thing about not waking up?”

Castiel sucks in a deep, shaky breath and nods. “I do have...nightmares...every time I sleep, yes. I think I am slowly getting used to being unconscious, but it does still…’freak me out’.” Castiel hopes he utilized the air quotations correctly. He'd been practicing. They stare at each other for what feels like an eternity - which Castiel feels can't be true because he knows what an eternity actually feels like. Eventually Dean takes a deep breath and opens his mouth. 

“Well - and if you ever tell Sam this, I  _ will  _ kill you - next time you have a nightmare come to my room and wake me up, okay? I know, from when Sam used to get them pretty often, that being with someone helps you go back to sleep.” Dean looks very uncomfortable. Castiel feels affection well up like it always does, and a smile forms on his lips without him even realizing it. 

“Thank you, Dean.” The man gives a grunted “yeah whatever” in response as he rubs that back of his neck. Castiel hums and decides to say what he’s been wanting to say since that night.

“I was thinking about our argument, and I heard you and Sam talking afterwards.” Dean immediately looks guilty, so Cas continues quickly before he can think the worst. “I’m not mad, Dean. I understand that you are trying to help me. What I wanted to say about it, was that I could  _ never  _ hate you.”

There’s a heavy pause. Dean looks shaken, and Castiel starts to worry that he’s committed a faux pass. Was that somehow inappropriate? 

“You shouldn’t say that, Cas,” Dean eventually mutters. His shock has been replaced by a deep sadness that Castiel feels like an angel blade to the chest. “I’m pretty good at fucking things up.”

Dean laughs, but it is without humor. Castiel shakes his head and raises his hand to grip Dean’s forearm tightly.

“I could  _ never  _ hate you. You will believe me one day, but until then I will remind you.” Castiel smiles and chuckles softly. “We have a bond, and even though I am no longer an angel it has not disintegrated.”

Dean smiles too, but it’s more reserved. He laughs, and this time there’s real humor in it. 

“You say the most embarrassing shit.” Dean shakes his head like he’s exasperated, but Castiel knows otherwise. Dean appreciates verbal reassurance, even if he’ll never admit it. “Don’t ever say that stuff in front of Sammy, or I’ll never hear the end of it.”

Castiel’s smile widens.

“Of course, Dean.”

**Author's Note:**

> Would be willing to consider any prompt ideas *cough cough*


End file.
